Video/Sketches

10 hours ago
1 min

All-NBA Conspiracy Team

Here's the lineup: PG: Chris Paul (NO/LAL trade suspiciously vetoed by David Stern) SG: Kyrie Irving (Flat-Earth-er) SF: Kevin Durant (Ne...

Dan Carney

a day ago
3 min

The Sixers: Done Processing(?)

The Philadelphia 76ers' telling fans to "Trust The Process" is like your alcoholic friend drunkenly telling you that he's "got it under c...

Dan Carney

Aug 6
13 min

the bubble's top 50

These are my top 50 guys that are playing in the NBA's bubble. I took talent, stats, and team impact into account when forming this list....

Dan Carney

Aug 3
1 min

Ellen Set To Buy Knicks, per reports

When current New York Knicks owner James Dolan heard of Ellen Degeneres’ tyrannical approach towards her employees, he knew he found his ...

Dan Carney

Jul 31
10 min

Every NBA Player That Comes To Mind For Each Song From Taylor Swift's New Album "folklore"

In order to write this article I did something I’ve never had the urge to do before: dissect Taylor Swift’s music. On the surface, every ...

Dan Carney

Jul 12, 2019
5 min

"Someone Jailbroke the NBA". An OffSeason Recap.

Quick Recap: Someone jailbroke the NBA this offseason. I don’t know if I ever made this many moves playing Association on 2k. Suffice to ...

Dan Carney

Jun 18, 2019
3 min

Recapping the 2018 NBA season

Where were we? I’m pretty sure we left off with me hyping up the Raptors after their Game 1 victory against the Sixers in the Eastern Con...

Dan Carney

May 9, 2019
3 min

Buck F***ed

Last night the Bucks got (Greek) freaky with Boston’s whore-ific defense, and boy did it look consensual. The Celtics rolled over on thei...

Dan Carney

May 2, 2019
3 min

If I Was Zion...

If I was 6’7, 280 lbs, and could dunk from the free throw line, then all my problems would be solved. My life has not turned out quite th...

Dan Carney

Apr 30, 2019
3 min

No Fool's Gold: The Nuggets' Future

Two years ago my friends formed a group chat to roast me when I said the Denver Nuggets could end up with home court advantage in the pla...

Dan Carney

Apr 29, 2019
2 min

The Earth Is 5000 Years Old, But These Raptors Are Real

Everyone knows the Pagans imagined dinosaurs to pull people away from the church and God (Corinthians 3:21). It’s a historical fact, and ...

Dan Carney

Apr 26, 2019
2 min

Mild Or Wild Weekend? Recap and Playoff Predictions

West Coast We’re a game or two away from the second round of the playoffs, and so far we’ve been left with only a few surprises - and som...

Dan Carney

Apr 25, 2019
4 min

Battle Of The Bonded: Who Wins First?

When Lebron left the Cavs before the 2010 season, Dan Gilbert infamously claimed that his team would win a championship before “ the self...

Dan Carney

Apr 24, 2019
3 min

Draft Dodging: The Case For NOT Trading The First Pick For Anthony Davis

With Anthony Davis looking to leave the town where I went to my first strip club, teams are stockpiling assets in hoping they can convinc...

Dan Carney

Apr 23, 2019
2 min

Rockets Blue Balls, Slutty Suns, and Bucks say "Bye-Bye"

The Jazz looked like they could beat some teams up in the playoffs this year, especially with Mitchell developing and Rudy Gobert posting...

Dan Carney

Apr 22, 2019
2 min

The "Greek Freak" and other problematic nicknames

“King James”. “Superman”. “Danaconda” (me). It’s not often that a self-given nickname sticks. Most nicknames in sports are bestowed by fa...

Dan Carney

Apr 22, 2019
3 min

The Most Boring Playoff Teams, And If They'll Be More Fun Next Year

If you asked me to list my top 50 vacation destinations, I could guarantee you that neither Orlando nor Detroit would appear anywhere. Ho...

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